Smoodock's Blog

After hearing what Jesus told the Pharisees (Matthew 19:4-6, 8-9), the disciples approached him, probably after they left, saying, if what he said was true about the husband and the wife, then it is good not to marry at all (Matthew 19:10). Nevertheless, this understanding is in direct conflict with the scripture: “It is not good for man to be alone!” (Genesis 2:18). Therefore, we need to ask, were they ignorant of the scripture or were they disagreeing with Jesus, vis-à-vis the Master (their teacher)? Were they, instead, agreeing with the Pharisees’ doctrine that a man should be able to divorce his wife for any cause?

The disciples’ reaction to Jesus’ teaching in Matthew 19:4-6, 8-9 tends to be confusing, and many scholars conclude that they were simply uneducated and tended to follow Jewish traditions. While this may often be the case, they did put themselves in an environment, where those traditions were almost constantly being challenged by Jesus. So, I believe they were quite open minded, certainly more so than the Pharisees. They may not have properly understood everything Jesus claimed, but they tended to think that believing Jesus was better than following traditions, even when they were ignorant and were unable to defend their position among those who disagreed with Jesus (cp. John 6:66-69). So, understanding this, what lay behind the disciples’ statement in Matthew 19:10?

I believe they understood that becoming one flesh (Genesis 2:24) was a process, and that process was difficult, even under ideal means (Proverbs 18:22; 19:14), so what if one makes a bad bargain (Proverbs 19:13)? Being a fool or contentious isn’t always rebellion. Often, they are simply ignorant, but, even so, how can one be devoted to (cling to) such a one who always seems to work against unity? It is this, that I believe Jesus’ disciples had in mind. There are folks many of us fall in love with and marry before we understand the full impact of what a close relationship with them would be like. Some folks are very foolish and are very difficult to work with. While they don’t commit fornication, neither do they work consistently toward unity, and it falls to the wise helpmate to take up 70 to 90 % of the burden of making a marriage work. While it isn’t fair, neither is it fornication, and it does not qualify as a reason for divorce. Being ignorant and a poor helpmate is not a reason to dissolve a marriage. The fact is, the Lord had taken such things into account, saying that he, who swears to his own hurt and changes not, honors God (Psalm 15:1, 4). Jesus responded to his disciples’ concern by saying not everyone is able to abide by their conclusion, but some, indeed, are able (Matthew 19:11). Some folks are born able, vis-à-vis impotent or simply not having sexual desire amounting to any significance. Other folks in ancient times were castrated by a conquering foe, when they were placed in the service of their captors and dealt with or worked among their enemies’ women. Such folks no longer had any desire for women, and could naturally avoid marriage successfully. Still other folks, out of devotion to the Lord, were able to overcome their natural desire for women, because the Lord helped them to do so, because they desired to spend their lives serving the Lord only (Matthew 19:12). Therefore, since not everyone is able to live apart from women (cp. Genesis 2:18), it would be unwise to try without a true sense of calling, because temptation would overtake one’s resolve to be alone (1Corinthians 7:1-2).